Monday night we went to the pool with Aunt Jamel and the kids. I ask Jamel to look at Layla's teeth because I thought she may be getting her molars. Jamel could not see anything, but said she is the right age. She then asked " she still uses a pacifier?" Oh no...she could tell. She said her palate had an arch and we needed to stop using one, and try to get away from sippy cups as well. I was heart broken, I don't want to do anything that may impact her life long term, however I was not ready for this battle. After she potty trained early and went to a big girl bed we had decided to leave this one alone for awhile. I had never planned to use a pacifier past like 6 months. I never wanted a toddler walking around with one. But the older she got I realized I just didn't care. It makes her happy, and she didn't use it all the time. It was for sleeping and the car and some times while playing upstairs. So I thought it was something I would deal with later in her life.
But I know found us at a point where we needed to do something. Jatovi has Bulls Games all week so I was not going to do anything about it while he was not here. I was not going to listen to the crying by myself, I am not that strong. I have heard of great ways to get rid of it that seemed better than cold turkey( which is what Jamel said to do)
* go to build a bear and put it in the bear(my favorite)
* tie then to balloons and send them to the moon
*trade them for another toy
So we decided to wait until the weekend, go to build a bear. We are going to the beach next week so maybe she would forget about it while there and like her new bear. In the mean time Tuesday I cut the end off of it. Another tactic I had heard works, if they can't suck it isn't as rewarding. Although she kept telling me "her pacy was broken" she kept on using it. I guess she figured it was better than nothing. So hide all of them, give her the broken one until we were all home on Sunday, then to build a bear we would go.
Well not as planned as usual...."pacy went with her poop"
Last night at bedtime she said she had to poop. I took her even though I didn't believe her, and sure enough she went. As she lend over to flush...the broken pacy fell in! The look on her face was so priceless, and into the tears she went. My heart broke for her, as I stood there trying to decided what to do. Do I go get another one and cut it..even though I had told her they were gone? I was a little panicky. Jatovi wasn't home, and I couldn't deal with the crying. I picked her up and we sat and rocked. She stopped crying and said"pacy went with my poop" Well at this point I decided to be strong. Yes Layla it did and it will not be back. She went to bed with very little tears.
I was so proud of my big girl, but I was more proud of myself. I didn't think I had it in me to be strong, and I did. She was not asked for it today, but does talk about it every time she goes into the bath room. So I know I can't give in and give her one, no matter how hard she cries. I think this was been harder on me than her!
Thursday, August 9, 2012
Sunday, August 5, 2012
Yin and Yang
Before we had Layla I was terrified. For as long as I can remember I didn't even know if I wanted children. The hesitation was all fear based. Jatovi has always known he wanted children, and because I trust him with all of my heart, we took a chance.
Layla Katherine has been the BEST decision I could have ever made. Although mother hood has been so muck different than I could have thought. I was sure that a newborn baby would be great, sitting around holding your baby, watching it sleep. What could be better? But I was afraid that once the child grew up I wouldn't know what to do. Watching other toddlers over the years did nothing for me. They get into things , don't listen, and cry loud and this was not for me.
However in my life lessons that I have learned from my Lay, I found it to be the exact opposite. The baby stage was exhausting, and miserable for me.I need sleep and she gave me none, she cried all the time, so there was no sitting around holding her. As for Layla the toddler, I LOVE it. I adore her. She makes me laugh, she makes me smile and I have so much fun with her......most days!
Life with a two year is very interesting. She can warm my heart with a smile, make me laugh out loud with a questions, make coming home from work the best, but boy can she drive me crazy too!
She can be stubborn, demanding, and loud. She is messy and bossy. I can go from a terrible day with her, when I think will this day ever end. To waking up then next day to a perfect princess that I want to be with every second. It is days like this that keep me going. During the bad days I need to tell myself it is all worth it because tomorrow, she will look at me and say "I love you Daddy"..lol
Yin and Yang
Because living with a two year old has it's ups and downs I now find myself with a struggle internally again. " Do we have a second?" For most of Layla's short life I have thought...not a chance. She is perfect, lets not mess with that. However the older she and I both get I find myself thinking that one more might me ok. Although I am terrified again, it turned out ok the first time right? what could go wrong with another adorable child around?
See that is the problem, I can think of many things. The baby could be sick, I might not love it as much as Layla, it could cry more that she did, we can't afford it, more laundry to do, a messy house, and that's just to name a few. I see these other mom's that have 2 and 3 kids and just seem to know that's what they want. I just wish I didn't have the personality that worries about everything.
However what would I do with all of my free time if I wasn't worried about something? I can't imagine a life that calm. So for now I will worry about the future little Mcduffie like I did Layla and if it turns out half as well as she has then it will be ok.
Worry number one...getting pregnant!! Let the fun begin.
Layla Katherine has been the BEST decision I could have ever made. Although mother hood has been so muck different than I could have thought. I was sure that a newborn baby would be great, sitting around holding your baby, watching it sleep. What could be better? But I was afraid that once the child grew up I wouldn't know what to do. Watching other toddlers over the years did nothing for me. They get into things , don't listen, and cry loud and this was not for me.
However in my life lessons that I have learned from my Lay, I found it to be the exact opposite. The baby stage was exhausting, and miserable for me.I need sleep and she gave me none, she cried all the time, so there was no sitting around holding her. As for Layla the toddler, I LOVE it. I adore her. She makes me laugh, she makes me smile and I have so much fun with her......most days!
Life with a two year is very interesting. She can warm my heart with a smile, make me laugh out loud with a questions, make coming home from work the best, but boy can she drive me crazy too!
She can be stubborn, demanding, and loud. She is messy and bossy. I can go from a terrible day with her, when I think will this day ever end. To waking up then next day to a perfect princess that I want to be with every second. It is days like this that keep me going. During the bad days I need to tell myself it is all worth it because tomorrow, she will look at me and say "I love you Daddy"..lol
Yin and Yang
Because living with a two year old has it's ups and downs I now find myself with a struggle internally again. " Do we have a second?" For most of Layla's short life I have thought...not a chance. She is perfect, lets not mess with that. However the older she and I both get I find myself thinking that one more might me ok. Although I am terrified again, it turned out ok the first time right? what could go wrong with another adorable child around?
See that is the problem, I can think of many things. The baby could be sick, I might not love it as much as Layla, it could cry more that she did, we can't afford it, more laundry to do, a messy house, and that's just to name a few. I see these other mom's that have 2 and 3 kids and just seem to know that's what they want. I just wish I didn't have the personality that worries about everything.
However what would I do with all of my free time if I wasn't worried about something? I can't imagine a life that calm. So for now I will worry about the future little Mcduffie like I did Layla and if it turns out half as well as she has then it will be ok.
Worry number one...getting pregnant!! Let the fun begin.
Trip North
We had a great time, fishing in Grammies pond, playing in the pool, African Lion Safari but most of all it was great to see Grammie and Poppy.
As fun as a trip home is, it really just makes me angry, sad, happy, and so much more. I am angry when I have to leave, sad to say good bye, happy I have Jatovi and Layla, and so much more. Leaving gets harder and harder every time. I miss my parents, and brothers. I want them to be "everyday" part of Layla's life. I get so jealous of Jatovi, he gets to see his parents with Layla all the time. But then I sit back and realize if I didn't live in NC I would never have met Jatovi and all things since.
So I have to take the good with the bad and say "Good bye until next time"!!
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